Blessings and Breaking Points

Life is full of love, laughter, and happiness. It is also filled with disappointment, anger, and sadness. Some times there are so many blessings happening in ones life that you don't really notice the small little bad, irritating things going on. Until you hit a breaking point.

This weekend started off like any other. I got off work at 5 on Friday and decided to treat my children to a smoothie. On my way home i picked them up each a strawberry and banana smoothie just so they could have a treat. No reason other than that. Brought it home and of course like all children they were excited. Then that turned into them each being their age and the fact that they are brothers and sisters. So of course they use the straws that came with their drinks to create a mess.

Once the drinks were then taken away because of them doing that and the mess cleaned up we then just chilled for a little bit. Then it was time for teeth brushing and getting the kiddos to bed.

Once that was accomplished my husband and I had a nice little dinner out at Olive Garden. We then came home and rested for the night.

Saturday morning rolled around and my brother, who has been looking to buy a vehicle for himself, needed a ride to look at a truck. So most of this morning was spent driving to get the money out of the bank and then waiting for the gentleman that was selling the truck to see if it would pass smog before driving three hours away to look at it.

((it didn't pass, so we didn't have to driver down there, whewww))

Then something happened. A conversation, that's all it was and it triggered something in me and a LOT of emotion just rolled over my heart all at once. Everything that I had been keeping to myself and trying deep down to not express and trying to say wasn't bothering me, when it really was, came to the surface.

All of the sad things, little in comparison to the blessings, started to come to the fore front of my thoughts.

Recently a really good friend moved away to a different state. Not only a friend but my boss. This has made my work place not as enjoyable as it once was, it also means that we can't hang out during our weekends.

Being passed up for a promotion at work for a reason that not only doesn't make sense  but the denial of said promotion actually seems a little spiteful on the part of the person that would grant the promotion.

Two friends had deaths with in their families which were extremely heart breaking. One had a brother who passed. The other it was their first born child. When ever a friend has a death in their family it always brings up memories of when my brother passed, feelings that haven't been completely dealt with.

Through all of the sadness though I can see how truly blessed I am. I have a job, it may not be where i want or what i would like to be doing but it brings in a pay check. I have 4 healthy children that i love and adore. An amazing husband who sees that my heart is hurting today and allows me to seclude myself in our room to allow myself to feel the feelings i am having. Which has brought me to this moment to write it all down. In the hopes that it will help me feel better.

Life is not always roses it never has been. But I wish that life would be a bit easy for the next few years. I just want things to go my way. I know that is not realistic and is extremely selfish. Really it's Gods plans I hope win over all his path is the one that i want to go down.



Side note: good for me on a third posting so soon. LOL.

Thank you for reading!!!